It’s Not About Us Is About Them (Kids)

The first time I heard this statement was for an Introduction talk on teaching kids how to handle money. The speaker ask us to repeat this statement again and again reminding that every time we are out preaching is all about the kids. The kids are always the priority.

Till today I still remember and practice this saying.

Even now every decision I make is based on that statement.

Becoming a mother to a young beautiful little girl, every decision I make is around the fact on what is best for this little one.

But sometimes I tend to forget that particular statement.

Decisions are made at the spur of the moment, my own selfishness.

Businesses that are run with zero empathy sometimes leads and drags me to this chaos. Sometimes I’ll sway so far into the darkness into my own selfish struggles that I forgot that statement.

It’s not about us is about them.

Suze Orman and her brutal honesty

I fell in love with the idea of helping people to get back on track to manage their finances!

I was obsess with her show since then. Watching every episode that she appears on Oprah. It was very interesting and I really wanted to pursue a career exactly just like that!

I still clearly remember the first time I watch Suze Orman on TV. It was one of her first appearances on the Oprah Winfrey Show. How she helped a young girl get back in control of her finances. Cutting back on all unnecessary expenses and increase on paying back on her credit card loans.

Well I did but specializing in Islamic Financial Planning.

But I’ve learn more about personal finance from years of reading, listening to podcast and watching videos then I ever did when I was back in the University.

I really still do wish to pursue in preaching people to better manage their personal finances. Because Suze Orman’s brutal honesty is what some of us really need to pursue the path of financial literacy.

Never Stop Reading

The advice I got from my mentor on career advancement is to never stop reading. The news, articles and books. She will frequently suggest books or provide me books from the library for me to read.

What I lack in years of experience I’ll replace it by reading.

She always warn me not to waste time at work given at any free time I got read a few articles or read the latest news report. If at the least laziness listen to a podcast.

Warren Buffet’s key to his success is by spending most of his time reading.

“Read 500 pages like this every day. That’s how knowledge works. It builds up, like compound interest. All of you can do it, but I guarantee not many of you will do it.” -Warren Buffet

But Buffet takes this habit to the extreme by reading around 600 to 1000 pages daily when he began his investing career and still manage to allocate 80% of his day to day habits to read.

Elon Musk also build his empire by just reading books. According to his close relative he reads more then an average person reads, that is the reason how he could learn twice as much faster then the average.

From picking up this habit I have learn 3 things;

  1. I asked the right questions. When the right questions was ask I built a better relationship with others both personally and my workplace.
  2. I was a better listener. Also I knew how to manage people with different personality and feed on their ego. Relationship win!
  3. Help me beat my anxiety. In meetings or any networking events I always feel anxious over large crowd. With a lot of the reading I made I learned how to handle my anxiety better.

I know there is much more benefits out there. Currently this is based on my personal experience after 3 years experience working. I hope to keep going with this habit and push it as near possible way of the great Warren Buffet and Elon Musk.

Financial Anxiety – How It affects Your Body

One of the top factors that cause financial problems for Malaysians is poor financial planning, the high cost of medications, business failure, and uncontrolled credit cars usage. The rise in number of bankruptcy in Malaysia amongst Millenials have reached 25,000 (as of June 2015; The Star). Many feel trap in this financial wheel and your body will be affected by this stress.

Sleep Issues

Thinking about how you can repay your debt or worse if you had borrowed money from illegal it could affect the safety of yourself. Waking up in the middle of the night consistently thinking about all the financial obligations. When you experience a few restless nights will not bring an impact on the body but if it becomes a pattern, the stress that you are experiencing can be toxic.


If you experience stress your brain muscles tend to be tense and is a protection mechanism from injury. Constantly feeling tense will have the muscle be consistenly tense and tight. Therefore it would effect the tension of the neck, shouders and head.

General Pains & Body Aches

Having constanly thinking about your financial situation and feels hopeless about it can take a toll on your body. When the pain starts from the pain it will start fulling towards your system with stress hormones. Being on the edge constantly regarding your current situation may make your brain to lead on the edge and you anticipate that something worse were to affect you.

Getting Sick More Often

Consider how you feel about your current financial state if you notice that you often feel sick. Constant stress can lead to the weaken of the immune system and will lead towards more sick days.

Dealing with Financial Anxiety

Paying attention to how it makes you feel when you start talking about your finances or checking your bank account balance. Acknowledge if you have a physical reaction towards it consider what are triggering these feelings. Using this technique teaches ourselves to work with our emotions instead of ignoring the situation. It is also to best seek help if you feel overwhelmed because achieving your financial goals are just not about the numbers but also the emotions, attitudes and thoughts that drives us towards those behaviors.

Reflecting on my life choices

I have two kids and I am 27.

I have a 8 to 5 job, I teach English part time and I sell frozen food (kuih) part time too. Graduated a degree in Business Administration (Islamic Financial Plan) and it has been 5 years since I left school. I still feel bad looking and my current financial situation.

Scroll down through social media I see my pears all out from one holiday to another and their night life, weekends branches. I feel sick to my stomach watching them one by one. Don’t get me wrong I am so happy for them they get to live life on their terms and they are in a happy place. But how do I reach to that spot where I am content with myself.

People questioned my life choices all the time but all my choices are base on what I felt important was my happiness. It didn’t hit me till now I slowly started doubting myself. Maybe they were right I am doomed to begin with.

After giving birth to my second boy I decided to stop all this negative self talk and just do something about it. SO started a instagram account called @dearduit.

Through the journey thought me, whatever I was going through my life experience all of it has it’s purpose.

Every mistake and every wins has it’s own life lessons. I believe without that experience I wouldn’t be where I am today.

I maybe struggling now but I know I am not alone.

Dear Duit, I believe I will be having a better relationship with you this year 😉